Next Segment on the Chronic Journey

Lighthouse en route on ChiCheemaun Ferry from Toberymory to South Baymouth, Manitoulin Island
Ontario

I've broken this vacation (in Canadian "holiday") into small, more manageble increments because just  as we we were physically travelling on from one destination to another, seeing new sights, having new experiences, so was my body, mind and emotions.  No two days - or segments - were the same.

Each day was different.

The challenges that I detailed in my post "When the Acute Morphed Into the Chronic", fatigue, lack of energy, hypervigilism, etc., were still with me while other symptoms became evident as the days progressed.

The first change in my routine was that I would be exhausted by 7 p.m. and hit the bed - or air mattress - early.

Therefore, by my body calculations at midnight I'd been asleep for about five hours and felt like it should be around 2 or 3 a.m. while poor hubby was just settling down for his night's rest.

It made things just a little bit more interesting on the road to recovery trying to adapt to these changes - for both of us.

ChiCheemaun Ferry loading at South Baymouth for return to Tobermory

After Tobermory, we boarded the ChiCheemaun Ferry and headed across Georgian Bay towards Manitoulin Island - or what Hubby and I call the continuation of Highway 6 which takes travellers to the mainland and the Trans Canada Highway.

We've done that before while heading for various vacation destinations with children such as Saulte Ste Marie, Ontario and Pancake Bay on Lake Superior just above the Saulte.

This time was different in that it was just the two of us.  While we had an itinerary in our minds, after Tobermory nothing set in stone as in reservations, etc.  We were free to wander, stop where we wanted to and for as long as we wanted to.

Hubby had devised his own somewhat unusual method of helping me in times of crisis by putting my camera in my hands, me in the car and taking me somewhere with the instructions that when I wanted to stop for any reason, especially if it was to take a picture, he would stop.  He gave me control.

In retrospect I think that has been an integral part in my journey of recovery as workplace bullying is all about power and control.  At the end, those against me had all the power and control while I had none.  It was not a nice place to be.

Recovery is about regaining control.  Not control over others - even hubby.  Control over myself.  Allowing me to control our stops was huge for me.

It was a gift.

This time we took it leisurely.  We lingered in South Baymouth, wandering around the souvenir shops and the harbour/marina area.

I got the above picture of the ChiCheemaun ferry as it was leaving South Baymouth and heading back to Tobermory.

This was the very picture I'd had lined up in my camera sights several years before.  Just when the perfect picture, the perfect opportunity presented it, when I was just a second or so away from snapping the shutter, a tall man jumped across the boundary, stopped right in front of me, raised his camera and took the very picture I wanted.

The disappointment was so acute that I could feel it in my body.

I was angry at the man, but could do nothing about it.

I never dreamed that it would take two back to back stress breakdowns, a complaint against me by my former co-workers and an offer for me to resign by the company for me to finally get the opportunity to take this picture I had coveted a few years before.

South Baymouth at the tip of Manitoulin Island

After lingering in South Baymouth for a bit, we headed across Manitoulin Island on highway 6 towards Espanola and the trans Canada.  Again with the instructions to sing out when a photo op took my interest.

Traversing Manitoulin Island to the Trans Canada Highway at 10 Mile Point
Jesuit Mission Placque

We'd driven past 10 Mile Point and this placque about the Jesuit Mission to Manitoulin many times over the years, but had never stopped to take a look see.  To read it.  To savour the moment.  To take pictures.  To live in the present.  To be.

10 Mile Point

I don't remember why this place is called 10 Mile Point whether it's 10 miles from somewhere or because of the distance one can see on a clear day.  I only know that it was peaceful.  We were after Labour Day, so there weren't the people there might have been at other times.

Dilapidated House that Caught My Eye near 10 Mile Point

Our travels across Manitoulin Island ended with the Swing Bridge at Little Current.  It didn't take that long to cross it.  Probably only two or three hours.  After that, we travelled to Saulte Ste Marie where we spent the night.

However, this short segment in hindsight was huge in my journey towards recovery as no new symptoms presented themselves that day and the rest were held at bay while I was cosseted safe and secure in our car with hubby at the wheel.

Swing Bridge at Little Current, Ontario

This post may sound like a travelogue.  "Hey look at this beautiful part of Ontario!"

Or perhaps nostalgia.  A memory.

It is indeed a memory on the very beginning of my road to recovery post workplace abuse.  One to surely be savoured many times over.

It was one day in which while I was definitely still coping and coming to terms with the chronic additions which had recently been added to my life, I was vertical.  With my trusted hubby by my side, encouraging me, I was able to take a deep breath mentally and simply be.  Simply enjoy.  Simply live that one day, actually part of a day, in such a way that looking back I see the beauty, I feel the peacefulness rather than the bad things.

It was also a day in which between the two of us, we were able to deal well with the symptoms.  To enjoy the day.  To make memories to look back on.