The Day I Felt Included

As I've mentioned before, the form bullying in the workplace took in my case was mostly that of isolation and exclusion.

Those I worked with on the afternoon shift, an off shift, in the small office frequently had a meal together on Fridays.  I was not included.  In fact, these people became so sneaky that they would go into a larger office area and use a phone there to order their meals.  Everything was hush hush.

If one co-worker went out for a coffee to bring back to the others, I was not included.  For a coffee aficionado like me smiling the brew in the small office was akin to torture.

I was not included in conversations even those that were business related.

It was like I didn't exist. 

It was hard, very hard.

For that reason in order to understand me as an individual working through workplace abuse, PTSD and trauma, one needs to recognize the veil, the filter, I process events through: the veil of isolation and exclusion.

This is why I want to share the below experience in this blog.

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I came home actually fairly refreshed, at least mentally if not physically, from our visit to Montreal to discover that while I was away friends were going through hard times.

One friend (oh! how I love to say that word) called me to let me know that her mother had died.

This friend is part of the prayer shawl knitting group at a local Lutheran church which I joined about a year ago.  

As I continue on with the group, I've found that the ladies of the group, mostly older than myself are very gracious and accepting.  They don't care where you've been or even if you go to their church or belong to their denomination.  They care only about the knitting.  If you can knit, you're in.  No questions asked.

So I went to my second church service in less than a week for my friend's mother's funeral.

And I had a really neat experience yesterday at the reception after a funeral which I'd like to share.

At the lunch, I went to sit with my buddies from the prayer shawl group and discovered that there were purses on each chair.  I was starting to turn away plate in hand when one of the prayer shawl ladies said quite robustly "You're going to sit with us" and proceeded to grab a chair from another table and tell the rest of the ladies at the table to make room.  

It was such a neat feeling to be wanted and included.

An unexpected blessing on the road to recovery.